Thursday, October 30, 2008

Dear Diary

Dear Diary,

I am so excited. So excited! The other night I went to my friend's house for a birthday party. Yes, a friend. Not just an ordinary friend. A best friend.
"You are my best friend," she said as she hugged me. "It's so great to have found such great friend in Tokyo. I didn't know I was going to find such a great friend but here you are!"

I did it! I really did it! After nearly two years here, I have found a true friend.

Oh no, it wasn't easy finding a friend in a foreign country. First, I had to remember how to find a friend. I actually think the last time I had to find a friend was in kindergarten...and that was easy. Sit near the girl with all the crayons. Stay away from anyone who eats paste. Learn how to skip rope. Done. By afternoon snack, I had a best buddy.

But, here, in a new home with new neighbors and, well, ..how does an adult find friends? Where do you start?

I started on the first floor of my apartment complex: the mailroom.
"Oh, hi there," I said to the first person who entered the mailroom to open her box, "you caught me getting my mail. We haven't met. Would you like to go out for some coffee sometime?"
"Actually, I don't drink coffee. Thanks though. See you later."
Open box.
Close box.
Peek around the room corner.
Open box.
Close box.
Peek around the room corner.

"Oh, hello there," I said to the next person who entered the room. "Just checking for my mail. You here for mail too, right? I see we both like to check the mail.....How about coffee? Would you like to join me for coffee?"
"Oh, I'm busy this week and I don't drink coffee. Maybe some other time."
Open box.
Close box.
Peek around the corner.
Open.
Close.
Peek around the corner.
Open.
Close.
Watch the sun set.

"G'day," a woman said to me.
Apparently I had fallen asleep leaning against the wall of the mailroom. Finding friends is exhausting work. "I'm new here," I said in a bored voice. "And, I'd love to have coffee with you sometime."
"Coffee?" She answered in an Australian accent. "I don't drink coffee, mate. But, I do drink Fosters. Why don't you come over now?"
Ding! I found a friend!

Another method I used to find friends was to go to my boys' bus stop. The hard part was actually getting to the bus stop. My boys don't really need me to escort them anymore. "It's raining," I pleaded to my boys. "I'll carry the umbrella for you, if you let me walk with you."
"OK, Mom. Just this time. But no kisses at the stop. Fist pumps only."

But I discovered the best way to find friends is through the kid's school. I met my best friend (she and I are definitely best friends now) while cheering for our sons' football team. It was much easier than standing in the mail room for hours.

"You are my best friend," my best friend repeated at her party. And, I took a picture of us. Me and my best friend. My ray of sunshine. Telling stories. Laughing. Eating cake.

It took nearly two years, but I've got a buddy.

I am excited. So excited.


Dear Diary,
Scratch the last entry.

Yesterday on campus I saw my best friend, my amigo, my tomodachi, mon ami, my freund. "Hi!" I said. I air kissed her cheek. Best friends air kiss.

"It's too bad you didn't make it to my house last night," she said.

Apparently, I look like someone else altogether in the dim light. And, after a few glasses of wine.

I'm heading back down to the mailroom.

2 comments:

ming said...

Some people just toss the whole BFF thing around like it is nothing! Shame shame. I know we are more than a bunny gram away but I am sending you a big shout out.

love,
ML

Cindy & Matilda said...

I'm laughing and crying all at once...I like this entry, it has a twist...haven't had a good twist ending since "The Sixth Sense" :)